self care
pounds of dry shampoo
a glass of ice water
cubes i squeezed in my hands
paired muscle relaxation
and i decide to try another temperature
a searing hot shower that stings
dripping down my face
no longer able to distinguish the tears from the water
i get out
dry off
change locations
laying in bed
playing the same album i fall asleep to every night
looking at the same ceiling
streetlights peering through my blinds
trying to imagine the beach
or the mountains
or the lake
box breathing that goes on forever
it feels futile sometimes
but what else am i supposed to do